A musing from a past 200hr YTT that'd resonates as I get ready for the next one...
So we have made it, elegantly poised in the middle of the storm.
We look back at the dusty road seeing how far we have come - tyre marks carved into the dirt and some muddy bog holes way back where. Then we turn the other way to see what we have coming up ahead - a long winding road, up into the mountains that goes way past where the eye can see. Here we stand, our Yoga family. In the middle of our 200hr YTT…
Days filled with fluid movement, sunrise and sunset find us chanting, humming, breathing and meditating. This leads me to this question…
Why do I even enter into this weird world? Chanting the same syllables over and over again, for hours at a time? How come I sit in pranayama, making my lips vibrate, so my entire face itches? What’s the point of staring at a candle flame in a dark room, trying not to blink, so that my eyes water profusely? And why oh why, do I set my alarm each morning to wake up before the sun at 4.30 am, when I could just snuggle up to my pillow and rest my weary bones?
This morning’s meditation led me to these exact questions…and the answer is ever so simple. Because of the feelings, thoughts and emotions that I am left with each morning after my practice. There is no other way to describe this space, other than awareness. I am left with a vast ocean inside my mind. The seas are calm, the breeze of my breath is subtle and deep, while my little pink heart rests on the raft that I have built and placed out in my sea.
For these exact reasons, I will continue along my journey, ready to meet whatever comes across my yogic path along the way. I'll keep on huffing and puffing, doing weird sucking in and out movements with my gut, sticking my tongue out of my mouth to roar like a lion, and chanting the same melodic sounds over and over again, alongside my yoga family.
I imagine that many human beings, who have never practised these glorious teachings passed down from sacred generations, would look at us and think we were totally nuts. And mayyybeeee they'd think of directing us to the nearest psych ward...
I’m proud of my learnings because they have taught me to deal with myself, and this glorious mess that we call life! But the most beautiful part of all this practice is that I am met with myself. The rawest and most vulnerable version of who I am at my core. Not what I have been seasoned to be, not what I have been taught over my years of existence on this earth, but the real deal - the power of what makes me tick, from the internal to the external...
"All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them" ~Galileo Galilei
A final note from Tara
I hope you enjoyed my diary entry! If you have any comments or thoughts, please pop them in the comments or in my Care to Share Box. If you are a regular practitioner within NSW who is interested in delving deep into their practice through a 200hr Yoga Teacher Training, take a look at joining the Mandala 200 starting on 1st November 2021.